Are you telling me someone has actually gone out and made an Xbox Live Arcade game that actually has a story? And has cutscenes? Are you kidding me? Am I getting Punk'd? Candid Camera? The Jamie Kennedy Xperiment? Nope, Assault Heroes is simply one of the best Xbox Live Arcade games yet.

In Assault Heroes, you play as one of the surviving members of an elite special military unit, and you are tasked with destroying some secret lab that has been conducting classified weapons research. Will you succeed at your mission or fall to the wayside like your other comrades? Though that is really all there is to the story, you do get some cutscenes, though nothing speak related, as instead they are usually little mini ones meant to lead you into the next zone or introduce a boss. Still, these cutscenes showing you zipping along in your car or boat look really nice and as if they were an officially purchased product as if you went into a store and plunked down the money instead of buying it online through a Microsoft service.

Actually, the whole game has that spit and shine, with the graphics looking very nice in what amounts to a topdown sidescroller like the ones that used to be predominant in arcades and console systems of old; unlike some games where after the nostalgia kick wears off there isn't really any reason to hang around, Assault Heroes constantly has you coming back. What really stands out is the attention to detail when it comes to the vehicles and enemies, such as the flame that spouts from your car or the destructive lasers heading your way, and the environment itself. For example, when you hit a tree, it doesn't simply flash and then disappear, but rather you actually see the animation of the tree falling down onto the field. Now, something like that might seem insignificant when you're worrying about three other tanks trying to take you down, but when you realize someone would go out of their way to program a tiny tree falling over, you know they are closely paying attention to their product and trying to make it the best it is without skipping over any of the corners.

The thing that is really fun about the game is that you can do co-op and go through the game with a buddy, which means you'll be able to not only laugh together when one of you die, but you can also yell at the screen in frustration after the giant mechanical crab just killed you both. The game also boats a leaderboard, which will have the hardcore and score oriented gamers striving to perfect their runs and climb to the top of the boards.

Another thing nice about the game is the difficulty. There are three different difficulties for you to choose from, but beyond that you can make it even harder (and more rewarding since you'll get more points) by purposely leaving your vehicle, because every kill you get outside your vehicle while on foot is more than if you had killed them in your vehicle. You see, you start out in a vehicle (though you can go on foot anytime) and once it has been destroyed you are instantly thrown out and must continue on foot. Now, that doesn't mean you instantly die and lose a life, because if you can hold your own for a few seconds, another vehicle will appear, which you can then jump into.

Along the way, as you make your way through the zones, you'll run across weapon upgrades that will improve your machine gun, flamethrower, and flak cannon. You can use each weapon whenever you want, but some are more ideal for certain enemies and situations. You've also got grenades you can lob into the air as well at your disposal. If you are on-foot, however, you are mostly stuck with your little machine gun that doesn't do much of all (talk about challenging).

What stands out the most, besides the attention to detail in the graphics and the overall fun of it all, are the large bosses that typically prove to be the hardest enemies of the bunch. For example, one boss looks to be a sub with its periscope engaged, but after some damage you see it isn't a sub at all, but rather this floating gun turret, and then after you do more damage you learn it is actually a giant mechanical crab, which managed to kill me quite a few times with its stabbing claw attack.

Overall, Assault Heroes is one of the best games yet on Xbox Live Arcade, and the points it costs definitely feels like a great deal and not one you should be regretting later after the dust has settled. Now, if only Microsoft could continue to pump out quality original titles like this, then the Live Arcade system wouldn't be the broken system that it currently is.

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